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On a recent episode of British motoring show Top Gear, outspoken host Jeremy Clarkson conducted an interview with Jay Leno and one of the questions asked by Clarkson was how difficult was it to get President "Obama Barack" on The Tonight Show. Leno was very gracious and didn't correct Clarkson on the gaffe, but when Clarkson realized his mistake, he said something to the effect that, "when you choose your name from Scrabble tiles, you have to expect that".
This really did give me a chuckle, because I've often scratched my own head on hearing some of the unusual monikers floating about these days, and Clarkson summed my feelings up fairly well, all the while excusing me from being the person who is politically incorrect.
It's my fault really, that some of the current baby names sound a bit...unique; after all, our generation grew up in an era of boring (by today's standards at least) Marys, Richards, Bobbys, Cindys, Toms and Johns, but while names such as Demetria, Madisyn, Cadence, T'Keya, Aaliyah, Laquisha and Rylee would have gotten big laughs in my day they, as proper names should, have an origin and a meaning. For example, "Barack" is actually Hebrew in origin, and means "lighting" or "spark", and that seems to sum up Mr President's personality quite well. "Demetria", a personal friend of mine, was given that name to honor a recently deceased uncle "Demetrius", which in turn is the masculine version of "Greek goddess of the Earth", and that's nothing to throw stones at. Even scrabble-tile contender "Aaliyah" is Arabic in origin and means "sublime", and I've been called much worse than sublime in my lifetime, I can tell you.
Where it all goes wrong though, are when parents who, through some form of temporary madness, saddle their offspring with names such as, Tiger Lily, Heavenly, Moonbeam, NyQuell (named after an over-the-counter flu medication, no doubt), and Jawschwa, to name but a few. Do parents realize saddling offspring with such silliness is the verbal equivalent of a "kick me" sign? The worst name I've heard by miles comes from a story told by a maternity room nurse, who, along with her colleagues, tried to persuade a young mother-to-be that "Sh'taid" was not the best idea for a name for her daughter. I don't know if the persuasion worked, but if not, my heart goes out to the little girl, who will be forever taunted for having a name resembling "fecal-skull".
At the end of the day though, I shouldn't be so smug. While my own given name, "Julia" is noble in history (it was the name given to all women in the Julian family of ancient Rome) it's actual meaning, and that of my nick-name "Julie", is "down-bearded youth".
Thanks, Mom.
