ARE WE INFANITLIZING TODAY'S YOUTH?

A few weeks back, I got into a discussion about the current state of the economy with a third-year college student who has been earning extra income in the office, and he asked for my opinion on the outcome of this fiscal mess based on my experience (read: advancing years). I answered that I thought that for quite a few folk, the money crisis would not get better but, eventually, the economy would experience a slow recovery. Not being an economist, it wasn't a very enlightening discussion on my part, but it picked up a bit when I remarked, "the question is, who will be left standing?". This struck a chord in him because he remarked how many people in his age group he knew were totally unprepared for the tough times that lay ahead because they have never held down a job.

Now, at the risk of sounding like the grandparent everyone has had ("when I was your age"...), I think the young man is correct. I look around and see what seems to be an entire generation of young people who have never known anything but prosperity, whose parents strive to give them material possessions and spending money, without making any attempt toward educating them on the simple economic theory of quid pro quo.

For example, let's take the children of the partners in the business where I'm currently employed. All of the children go to private schools (tuition ranging from $6,000-12,000 annually), and don't understand public transportation because they are chauffeured to and from school and extra-curricular activities (of which there are many) by parents, grandparents and parents-of-friends. Need supplies for a school project? Not to worry; text your father at the office and tell him he needs to pick them up from the store on his way home. None of the children have come within smelling-distance of any type of work (including something as basic as baby-sitting, the staple of young-girl-employment in my day...), but they all have more video devices, computers, cell phones and pocket money than me and both my two jobs can afford. As easy as it would be for me to blame the parents, that wouldn't be entirely fair because they also came of age in a time of relative prosperity and financial stability, and I suppose they're only carrying on with a lifestyle of which they themselves are accustomed.

Maybe it's just me, but it seems that our generation was raised a bit differently than that. While we were never denied any of the basics, we were taught to be productive, self-sufficient individuals capable of sustaining our own lifestyles. Practically everyone in my peer group had a part-time job while in school; even the more affluent kids worked in their family's businesses. With the exception of one or two "rebels" pregnancy was out-of-the question for any high school girl because it was taken as read that the baby would not be taken home and given to our mothers to raise. Material possessions were given as gifts, not as an expected part of adolescence, and anything we wanted other than that was something to be worked for and earned. With that kind of upbringing, it was easy to transition into the economic realities of adulthood, because we became accustomed to dealing with economic uncertainty while in our youth, and still in the bosom of our parents.

So, who will be left standing at the end of this economic mess? As in all previous economic messes the answer is the same. The strong, resilient, adaptable and those prepared to make the necessary sacrifices will emerge relatively unscathed. Unfortunately, that leaves much of today's youth out of the equation because, sadly, no one has told them it's time to grow up.

SEARCHING FOR A JOB? GET TO WORK.

Now that the recent unpleasantness of partial-unemployment is behind me (having been resolved by acceptance of a rather tasty job offer), I've had time to take a deep breath, review the events connected with being unemployed and make an honest assessment of it all. The conclusion I've come to after hours of beer-filled contemplation is simple: everything about being unemployed is the pits. While this in itself may not be a revelation worthy of publication by The Huffington Post, it does give me an opportunity to offer some realistic observations and tips in the event any readers are or shortly will be among the ever increasing number of job-seekers .

Plan Ahead - If you suspect there may be trouble at your place of employment, it's probably because there is trouble. Don't assume everything is fine simply because your supervisor/co-workers/human resources department says so. Planning ahead is essential in order to take some of the stress off your job search. I'm speaking common sense here; pay down charge cards; avoid making any large purchases and plan where you can make cuts to your budget should you need to. At the very least you'll be prepared, and, if nothing else, you will have reduced your debt.

The Best Time To Look For A Job Is When You Don't Need One - Some wise soul told me this many years ago, and fortunately, I remembered it. I started registering myself on online employment sites and sending out resumes long before I was ever unemployed. It paid off as well; registering for employment sites is time-consuming. Re-writing and tweaking a dusty resume is time-consuming (I re-tooled mine three times before I was satisfied with what I was sending out), and generally taking your time in the beginning will make you more informed about the types of positions that are being advertised.

Avoid Agencies, If Possible - Now, this came as a total shock to me because, in the past, I've always been able to secure at least temporary employment from an agency. This go-round, however, I found I couldn't get so much as arrested, much less an interview, from an employment agency, despite having a vastly-improved resume. I'm not sure why that is, but I expect with a surplus of unemployed willing to work cheaply, the agencies were turning their attention to recent college grads. I continued to send my details into the agencies but got nary a nibble out of it all.

A First-Rate Cover-Letter is Essential - I don't know if this fact is being taught, but if not, you've heard it from me: your resume should be no more than one-page in length, and should be used to outline your basic experience and qualifications. Where you "sell" to a potential employer however, is the cover letter. I always made a point to ask people with whom I was interviewing how many applications they received, and it generally ranged from between 125-175. Now, think of it from a potential employers point of view; after reviewing the third or fourth application it must be a fairly mind-numbing experience. Use your cover letter to grab their attention; refer to your resume and state why you feel your past experience would be an asset to their current job opening and cite parallels between positions, if possible;it will demonstrate you've paid attention to their brief of the position. Your cover letter should also state your salary requirements; no need to get through to the interview stage if you and your potential employer won't be in agreement on this basic matter.

Be Prepared To Be Brutally Honest - In your cover letter and interview, don't be afraid to point out your weaknesses as well as your strengths. If the brief calls for "proficiency in XYZ computer software" and you've only had a passing acquaintance with it in the past, say so. Being honest and expressing a willingness to "bone up" on a particular subject will carry more weight with them be more comfortable for you, and is easier than trying to blag your way through, trust me.

Interviews Are Like Dates - and I never particularly cared for dating. But, what I've learned over the years from dating stood me in good stead for the interview process. Don't assume because you had a good telephone interview, the personal interview will go quite so well. Like dating, the person talking to you may have a completely different mental image of who is on the other end of the phone. Unfair? Yes. An undeniable fact? Also yes. It's important to be on your best behaviour in an interview, but also be yourself. Remember that the person you're speaking to you may be potentially seeing you five days every week for quite some time. Allow your natural self to peep through; it may be exactly what they're looking for. Most importantly though, don't assume that because your date...oops, interview went well, you'll hear from them again. I had several excellent interviews where I was specifically told I would be back for the second selection process, and I never heard from them again. It's sad, but, just like dating, there's plenty of competition out there. Move on.

The Bureau of Labor Statistics stated that there were a reported 15.0 million unemployed in the United States in May, 2010 so if you are currently (or soon to be) unemployed, take small comfort in the fact you're not alone. But, be aware that looking for work is, in itself, work. I hope my own experiences in the employment piranha-pool will save you some steps, provide some ideas, or both. Sermon over. Normal service will resume (no pun intended) next week.

BOND VILLAIN NOW HIRING

Good old BBC America. Every now and again, say after showing their smash reality show My Big Breasts and Me for the 51st time, they come through with something I enjoy. This month they are replaying selected James Bond films and that's great news for me because I love a Bond film. Any Bond film. Even one with Roger Moore as 007, which is what BBCA is showing.

Unfortunately, I have a love/hate relationship with their latest offering, Moonraker. On one hand I love it because it has a great evil genius, Hugo Drax (shown, played by Michael Lonsdale). Then there's the character of "Holly Goodhead", an astronaut-slash-Bond Girl with a name second only to Goldfinger's "Pussy Galore" in terms of improbablility. It also has a good musical score with a lovely theme song performed by Shirley Bassey. The problem with this film though, is somewhere in the middle it appears that the director and/or screenwriter started experimenting with the fumes from model airplane glue because, for no apparent reason, the wheels start to come off. The film dissolves into a series of farcical gags featuring the steel-toothed henchman, called "Jaws" trying his best to kill Bond while generally acting silly and pulling faces that would have made Tommy Cooper, Red Skelton or any one of The Three Stooges proud. It's a complete embarrassment to watch, so you go for coffee and a sandwich until the production team sober up and get on with it, which they eventually do.

If you're not familiar with Moonraker, here is the plot in a nutshell. Hugo Drax, evil billionaire and genius, decides to take out the entire human race (as you do) by escaping to his personal space station with six space shuttles and a group of hand-picked couples a la Noah's ark. His plan is to launch a necklace of satellites around the earth to release a deadly poison into the atmosphere fatal only to humans then return to start a New World Order. No, really, that's the plot but surprisingly, the film is not bad.

With such an ambitious plan you can imagine in order to carry out his dream of world domination, Drax has a very complex system of companies employing what must be thousands of people around the world, and maybe because of the current economic climate (but more, I suspect, the beer I was drinking) while I watched the film this time, I wondered: where does he get his help? Does the Drax HR Department outsource? Hire temp-to-perm? Use professional headhunters? Maybe they do things the old fashioned way and advertise in the local newspaper but I have to think that given the nature of his operation the ad would have a few warning signs. How far in arrears on your mortgage payment would you have to be to answer this:

COME JOIN THE DRAX TEAM! If you are an enthusiastic, team player with an eye toward the future, the Drax Corporation want to hear from you. We are beginning work on an exciting new global project, and qualified candidates are being sought in the following areas: terrestrial and celestial construction, manufacturing, import/export, supply management, heavy goods transportation, real-estate acquisitions and development, multi-media and computer specialties, travel services, administrative (all areas), aircraft piloting and maintenance, aerospace technology and logistics, hazardous biochemical systems delivery, space shuttle piloting and maintenance, security (special training provided), and attractive females with experience in seduction and treachery.

Employment is offered in our branches in Los Angeles, Rio de Janiero, Rome and Outer Space. Length of employment varies on location; long-term employees will be required to relocate temporarily to the Drax Space Station.

Our generous benefit package includes salary commensurate with experience, weapons training, free travel, free uniforms and free burial services for terrestrial-based employees. Room and board, employer-sponsored health care and 401(k) plan provided to long-term, celestial-based employees and seductive females only. The Drax Corporation is an Equal Opportunity Employer.

No phone calls please.

It doesn't sound very promising but with current national unemployment at an approximate rate of 9.5 percent, I'm sure Drax would have no shortage of applicants. And, there's one benefit the recruiters didn't mention; the possible chance to seduce James Bond, 007.

Gentlemen, my application is on its way.